How do you react when a teen you know
announces she is pregnant?
I've searched Emily Post for this one, and I can't find a reference. I remember my well-bred grandmother telling me years ago, that you react to someone the way they react. Ergo, if she is happy, you are happy for her.Trevor's stepsister, A, who is 18 (almost 19) just announced via Facebook that she is pregnant. I'm not sure how old the father is, who she is now engaged to. I know that she got a tattoo of his initials at the beginning of July, and she is seriously head over heels for him. I have no clue how long they've been together, but A has always fallen hard for her boyfriends. Her stepmother (who A lives with after the recent death of her father) is not the most strict parent-- she's long let A have boyfriends sleep over.
After talking to her sister (Trevor's half sister), M, I found out that A is trying to be responsible about the pregnancy. She has worked it out with her school that she can still graduate on time at the end of May-- the baby is due at the end of April. She and the father are getting married, and planning on raising the child. She's ecstatic, and I didn't feel it was my place to lecture her, especially in light of my own experiences. IMHO, I'm not her parents, and it is not my place to stage an intervention. I have NO idea if the pregnancy was planned, and perhaps that is a factor in the next section of this post.
So I left her a comment telling her "Congratulations!" I noticed tonight that Trevor's aunt, L, who I have always been very close with, even after my split from Trevor has deleted me off of Facebook. I have NO clue why. I haven't posted about Trevor in close to a year, and she still kept my mom as a Facebook friend. I'm assuming that the delete has to do with A's pregnancy. And if that's true, then how fucking juvenile is that ?!?!
It wasn't like I was supporting her going "YES! You should get pregnant!" and perhaps they are worried that all the positive attention that A is getting will cause M to think about getting pregnant as well. But that's a conversation they need to have with M.
Thoughts, readers? What would you have done?
4 comments:
I probably wouldn't have said anything on Facebook- simply because it could be construed as something other than that what it was.
BUT I've always been really vocal how anybody who accidentally gets pregnant is an idiot. It's 2010- birth control is readily available. Condoms are readily available. There is no excuse for people to mess up. And anyone who complains about being embarrassed by using or buying a contraceptive or complains about the "lack of feeling" is too immature to have sex in the first place. Just my 2cents! :)
Wow I really don't know what to say in this instance. Maybe silence would have been golden but I see where you would feel the need to say something!
And I agree with Sara above that will all the contraceptives that are available I'm not sure how teens are not more careful! I mean I've made it to 27 without getting knocked up (knock on wood lol).
I think this was a no win situation for you. No matter what you had said or not said.
This is tough one. I have a friend who got pregnant at 21, married the guy, then cheated on him, got divorced, got pregnant again at 22 with the guy she originally cheated on her first husband with, and then re-married. It's not quite the same thing, but it was one of those situations where I didn't know what to say.
I dunno, when my students turn up preggers, I usually just try and make sure they know their options.
btw, ridiculous that she would delete you from fb!
yoo its nice amd funny post =)
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