When I read the
post by Cheryl at Confessions of a Twenty-Something year Old, I immediately agreed with her. After all,
Dawson and I are best friends, and even though he and I have tried the dating thing once or twice, we always come back to this nice, easy, albiet a little too comfortable friendship. Men & women can be platonic best friends.
Less than 12 hours later, I went out to the a local bar to join girls for country line dancing. I'm trying to get into the workout groove again, but there are just some days I don't feel like running on the treadmill or sweating profusely to the Firm's videos. Line Dancing seemed like the perfect idea to get out of my house and dance away this funk that's been hanging over my head.
Dawson met me after he got out of work, and I was a little tipsy-- the caloric gains of dancing were negated by the four diet coke and Bacardis I consumed. Whoops. He texted Apache to let him know that he was there with me, reassuring him that even though I would never "Jody" him, he was still there to watch my back. Oh, and commented that I had lovely clevage that night. Apache, who knows Dawson well, laughed and asked him to send a picture. lovely.
So this woman I spent much of the summer bar hopping with (she's a friend of a friend) was there, and she was pleasantly surprised to see me there. She joined Dawson and I for a chat, and when she left, Dawson goes, "Who was that?" like the Cookie Monster who has just spotted a pizza size cookie. Dawson is fresh out of a relationship, and though he has several other females who he is "talking to" (read: fucking), he apparently wanted to add to his harem.
Do any of you ladies have "friends" who you just hang out with at a certain place-- like the gym, the bar, whatever, but would never consider a "bosom buddy?" This woman, hereafter known as Cougar, is one of those women. she's funny as HELL to be with at a bar, and since men swarm to her like bees to pollen, she's good for, shall we say, business (at least when i was single). She's an alcoholic, possibly a drug addict, and I can't trust her as far as I can throw her, and I'm pretty sure she's carrying one or more diseases.
Now, I NEVER cock block Dawson. Hell, I'd hook him up with good friends because he is that good of a guy. So, my issue with Cougar is NOT about jealousy. And he's always been the one to stop me from making stupid in lust mistakes. So, I attempted to warn him about this woman and how he might end up needing to stock up on pennicillian.
Does he listen to me? Abso-fucking-not. He takes her home, fucks her about a dozen times (because he was a little "pent up"), and then proceeds to tell me how good in bed she was. And, oh, he didn't use protection because she "told him she was clean." He was sober, so being drunk is no excuse.
He's proud of this fact because, "I've never just picked up a chick and took her home to fuck before." Lovely.
I get this story at 7 am this morning--well before my coffee hits my brain-- and I lose it. I mean reallly lose it. Where I might have once tried to counsel him "off of the ledge," I'm not going to. That's just disgusting, and I tell him so.
He calls several hours after the tongue lashing, to explain himself:
Dawson--my wonderfully loving best friend that will make some lucky woman a devoted husband-- has decided its not worth it to be nice any more, since he keeps getting walked all over, so he's going to be a man whore. His new mantra in life echoes
David's from
The Rest is Still Unwritten:
My new outlook is I don't give a fuck about women because they don't give a fuck about me. From now on, in my mind, they are only good for one thing - getting me off. They can fuck me and then get the fuck out. I don't want to get to know you and I don't want you to get to know me. I'm not your boyfriend. I'm not even your friend. I'm just some guy you're fucking. A guy that uses you just like you use him. Afterall, you're going to fuck me over in the end anyways, so let's just cut to the chase and do the fucking up front.
He also has decided he's going to drink every night, and doesn't really care if he loses his job (yes, he has an apartment, car payment, and bills just like the rest of us).
I just feel like this philosophy is so counterintuitive to his goals. He's just going to end up being unhappier (more unhappy?) than he was to begin with, when he finds himself pummeling into debt.
Maybe men and women really can't be platonic friends for reasons that have nothing to do with sex. I can't understand this philosophy AT ALL-- I think it's a guy thing. Apache is offering no insight--he works with Dawson at the power plant, so I think he just wants to remain outside of the conflict.
I mean, I do understand that he's sick of being hurt -- though he has a tendency to choose women that "need" him (ie: single moms). And there are women out there, not all of them, who are looking for a generous guy like him with a decent job to become a surrogate dad. He's had two women like that within a space of a year. It just seems counterintuitive to decide that he's just going to fuck and run, when the women that are going to be willing to accept such an idea, are not going to be women he should date.
And it goes without saying the risk factor for getting someone pregnant, getting an STD, or being the victim of a swimfan.
Am I crazy for being so upset about this?
