Baby, I'll wait for you....

A lot has seperated in the days since I last posted.

Doc & I have broken up of my own request. I am not going to date someone that cannot find time his infintely  busy schedule to see or talk to me. Quite literally, I have gone a month between most of his visits. Despite his protests that he wants a relationship with me, his actions do not show it. I cannot be with someone who continually breaks dates on me because he'd rather work. Am I concerned that he was cheating on me? Not really--- I knew him for a year before we got together, and he is a workaholic. I just cannot be with someone I cannot count on because it's quite obvious that I am not a priority for him.

With that being said, it's going to come as a shock to you all that I've fallen in love. With Apache. After spending countless hours on the phone and web cam with him while he was at mobilization in Indiana, he came home on December 23. I picked him up at the Armory-- and thus began a week and a half of pure bliss. After all the time we spent talking, I wasn't shy. We spent most of the week together-- going to Kareoke, Club Hell, and seeing Avatar 3D and Sherlock Holmes. Each day has brought us closer and closer together. He took me (of his own request!) to his family's new year's eve party last night.

He leaves tomorrow for Indiana, Lousiana, then Afghanistan for the next year. I know it's going to be difficult, especially for a beginning relationship. But Apache has shown me he wants to be with me, something that Doc could not. From the texts, emails, and phone calls I could count on to him asking me to be his date to family functions and introducing me to his friends as his girlfriend, I know that I've found something special here. He brought me home this afternoon and I expected to say good bye to him here. As I turned to hug and kiss him goodbye, he asked me if I would go with him to his mother's house tonight. He wants me to go with him in the morning to say goodbye at the bus stop. I was floored. I never asked or suggested that-- he said he wasn't ready to say goodbye to me yet.....

As for him and DogFace, he's done with the relationship. She could only give him a few hours of the two weeks he spent in CT, and barely speaks to him. He plans on filing for divorce when he has access to an Army lawyer, probably in Lousiana.

I'm happy.. happier than I've been in almost a year. The circumstances are not ideal, but the pieces just seem to fit. I didn't begin talking to him, hoping to fall in love with him or lure him away from DogFace. It's simply what happened.

And so, my dear Readers, i'm going to need all the help I can get.

(he was wicked  tired here)